I was having a pretty good day, had my workout, the kids were behaving. And then... DH texted me. The text asked if I wanted to be the unit ombudsman.
A few years ago, I would have jumped at the opportunity. But yesterday, it was like a punch in the gut.
The last position I had before I resigned, I was happy to leave. I liked everyone in the office. However, I was new and did not know who to trust. In addition, I went from autonomy to micromanaged. I left that position feeling like a failure.
So, to be asked if I wanted a job, those feelings of failure washed all over me. I can't do this, I think to myself. And then I think, well the team lead was a jerk, maybe I can do this.
And then I thought about my kids. I did look forward to moving so I could resign and be with my kids. I don't think I will look for a job when DS is preschool age like I first thought I would. I enjoy being able to take DD to school, to take the kids to the library, and have playgroups. Furthermore, I get to go to the gym.
I am sure I can do that job and not have my time with my kids challenged. Right now, I don't get to do my crafts because I am constantly keeping tabs on DS. Maybe when he is a bit older, I may take on the challenge, but for now... I am going to enjoy being a SAHM
We came from a place with a huge military presence and this place does not have one. I like it! The only real reminder that DH is military is when he brings his uniform home on Friday to be washed.
I don't think I want to do the job. I do have until the 15th of November to turn in my application. I may change my mind, but I don't think I will.